Finally, I didn't know what else to do- I could tell something was wrong, friends were commenting how sick he looked and that he had lost weight- I took him to the doctor. After discussing symptoms, his blood glucose was checked three times, it didn't register on their meter and he was diagnosed with Type 1 Diabetes. That was it. So final. Even though I knew it was a possibility it still hit me like a ton of bricks. The doctor could see my concern and stopped talking mid-scentence to say, "Taking him to the emergency room is a matter of urgency not emergency. Get him there today, it will be okay." I came out and called Leo, he miraculously was out of clinic already for the day and five minutes away and he met me at home. I called my mom and heard her cheery voice say, "Hello!" I broke down and started sobbing. "Jamie, what's wrong? Are you okay?" "Bax has diabetes! We have to take him to the emergency room to get his blood sugars stabilized." I cried a little bit more, my mom tried to comfort me from across the country and I promised I would call when I knew more. We went home and packed a bag and got B lunch because we knew he wouldn't be eating any time soon. We called Leo's parents and Leo answered questions that I had no answers for as I drove to the hospital.
We showed the nurses at check-in the note from Bax's doctor and were ushered into the back to be treated before we had a chance to ask how long it would be. Bax was put into a gown and had IVs and tubes sticking out of his arms, he was crying, "Home, Mom, please! Mom, PLEASE!" as I held him as tight as I could as I cried when he was snuggled into my chest so he couldn't see me. We waited for an ambulance to take us to the downtown children's hospital because the site that we were at couldn't admit him because of his age and needing insulin. While we waited the doctors and nurses brought back lab results and played with our tiny boy. His blood glucose came in at 724, not as high as most when they are initially diagnosed but high enough to cause problems. His potassium levels were 9 (normal is 4) and he was required an EKG to make sure there were no heart problems related to increased levels, his triglycerides were not able to be measured in their lab because they were too elevated. The next morning we found out that he was over 4000, a normal is below 150.
Bax had a wonderful ride to the other hospital in an ambulance and the staff were all impressed at how sweet and alert he was. They said that most people are so out of it when they are first diagnosed that they can stick the IVs without any fight and they are usually too dehydrated to produce tears. They said that B was a fighter.
Dad stayed at the hospital with him that night and I went home to get bags for us and a few toys and movies for Bax. When I got back to the hospital in the morning, B was up and was drinking his first juice in about 16 hours, he didn't want anyone to help him and he struggled to drink from the straw on the juicebox with the boards on his arms. We were treated to visits from dieticians, nurses, diabetes educators, residents and specialists for three days and were taught how to care for him, how to count carbs, how to calculate insulin dosing for food and high blood sugars. By the second day in the afternoon we were both pricking his finger to check his blood and by the next morning giving him insulin injections under the supervision of nurses. I didn't know how we were going to do it, it went against EVERY fiber of my being to inflict pain on our son and here I was, hurting him to keep him alive, with a smile on my face so he couldn't tell how totally freaked out I was.
After three days we were being sent home with supplies, ten prescriptions to pick up, emergency numbers and hearts full of sorrow, terror, peace, and gratitude for the events of the past days. I don't remember a lot about our first days, I do remember waking up every 3 hours (if I got to sleep at all) and dreading each time I had to find him to check his blood.
Fast forward 20 1/2 months and we are where we are at now. B is fluent in diabetes, he helps check his own blood he has an infectious smile and is my hero. He is so sweet and talks about diabetes with anyone that asks and he has accepted it for now. Each day is an adventure that I didn't anticipate and as bad as it might sound, I don't know that I would change it. We have learned much as a family, we have witnessed B's strength and wisdom as his childhood was stripped from him and we try to preserve what is left of it. B is an inspiration to others and a lot of people have been educated about this auto-immune disease including me. We still don't sleep through the night most of the time but it is a small price to pay for the blessings and lessons we have been privy to.
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